


I want to swim in your love

by MindFungus



Category: SpongeBob SquarePants (Cartoon)
Genre: M/M, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-09
Updated: 2020-11-05
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:27:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23432389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MindFungus/pseuds/MindFungus
Summary: How bout we not look too deep into it?
Relationships: SpongeBob SquarePants & Patrick Star, SpongeBob SquarePants/Squidward Tentacles
Comments: 5
Kudos: 51





	1. It's not that deep!

**Author's Note:**

> shitty chapter summary coupled with a short chapter, all i can say is "have fun!"

It started off as a normal Bikini Bottom day, Spongebob woke up, as cheery as ever. He goes about on his usual schedule; Wake up, shower, get dressed, have breakfast, feed Gary, leave for work. This doesn’t include waiting for Squidward to leave his house just so they can walk together. 

It hasn’t been apart of his schedule for a while now, but he's been doing it without thinking. Squidward doesn’t really like walking with him, but some company is better than none!

Walking, talking, even working with Squidward makes his heart do backflips, he’s not sure why though. Maybe that’s just the power of friendship, but he doesn’t feel this way with Patrick! His heart doesn’t skip-a-beat, he doesn’t feel like skipping through a flower field or dancing around his room, or… you get it. Squidward is different, he makes him feel different. In a good way! He shakes it off, if he doesn’t stop dilly-dallying he’ll be late for work!

“Hey! Squidward!” Spongebob shouts, Squidward huffs and rolls his eyes. “Wanna walk together?” Sponge inquires.

“No, Spongebob. You ask everyday, and everyday I say the same thing.” groaned Squidward, “I don’t want to walk with you.” And everyday, a little bit of Squidward wants him to change his mind, to say yes.

Let’s ignore that for now, let’s ignore how his heart beats just a little quicker when Squidward sees him, it’s only heart palpitations. Nothing more. His hands getting sweaty, his breathing getting shaky, isn’t because of Spongebob, it couldn’t be. 

Spongebob was an annoying neighbor and an even more annoying coworker. They were neighbors and coworkers, never anything more. Squidward didn’t even see him as a friend, despite Spongebob claiming that they’re “the best of friends!”

Walking with Spongebob would be incredibly annoying, but before he could realize it, they were already walking into the Krusty Krab. He only snapped out of his thoughts when Sponge said, “Same thing tomorrow?” with a grin on his face. Dammit, not again! This happened last time, and the time before, and so on. 

How does this keep happening?


	2. Hearty Grease Trap!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yearning? While at work? Maybe some longing too?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made a playlist for this fic! [It's an 1 hr and 20 minuets of sick love songs!](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5mSjIkXcfbs3aOQ3HzseMu?si=jKohceOfSmakENqZSWqC3g) This chapt's just a lil longer. We're finally gonna get some Patrick action, very soon!

The day goes the same as it always would; Spongebob being annoying in the kitchen, Plankton tries to steal the Secret Formula, Mr.Krabs being a cheapskate, the whole nine yards. Squidward hates being a cashier at the Krusty Krab, but it pays the bills, it keeps him afloat. Even if Mr.Krabs is an awful boss, even if Spongebob is annoying, even if he drives Squidward crazy everyday; He has no choice, he had to put his dreams aside. 

Whether he wanted to admit it or not, he wouldn’t get far in the art world. He’s tried it before, then he had to rely on Spongebob after he lost his house. Squidward took advantage of Spongebob’s hospitality and treated him awfully. “Wish I could do that day over again,” Squid thought, “Maybe this time I’ll treat him better.” He sighs, lost in his thoughts once again. 

“Uhhh, can I have a…. number uhhhh…..” A nasally voice cut through Squidward’s thoughts like a hatchet to soft wood, he frowned and took the customers order. He’s going to have a migraine for the rest of the night. Spongebob on the other hand is having the time of his life! Working for the Krusty Krab has been a dream! Yes, there were some… less ideal work days, but working alongside one of his best friends, Squidward, makes the whole day enjoyable. Hearing Squidward through the order hole is enough to keep him swimming high, but he’s still not sure why he’s feeling this way. He’ll have to think about it after work, right now he’s gotta flip some patties and serve some customers! Mr.Krabs doesn’t pay him to sit around and think about Squidward, though he wishes he was.

The work day ends rather anticlimactically, very boring, and very quietly. Sponge was hoping to walk with Squidward, but he was already out the door. A tinge of panic hits him. Trying to catch up to someone taller than you is difficult, but Spongebob manages and lets out a sigh, “Whew, you almost left me back there!” Squidward rolls his eyes, but he doesn’t say anything. A slight smile crosses his face, which he quickly tries to hide. “Wish I did.” Squidward replies, lying through his teeth.

While Spongebob babbles on, he starts to think about what Squidward means to him, how he’s more than just a friend now. It’s love, but Sponge doesn’t want to rush into things that fast. Squidward might not feel the same, he might think they’re just friends. Spongebob can accept that, it’ll be like nothing’s changed! 

“What’ve you got on your mind, Sponge?” Squidward asks, he didn’t even notice that he went quiet.

Being called “Sponge” by Squiddy makes his whole body feel light as a feather~! “I’m… thinking about plans for tomorrow! Patrick and I plan on going jellyfishing, maybe we’ll read up on Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy comics?”  
Spongebob was unsure about that last part, maybe he’ll ask Patrick for help with his crush!

The two of them split off into their own driveways, giving a quick wave and a short “good night”. Leaving them to their own hearts, beating just a little faster than usual.


	3. From My Heart To The Paper.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Running around and passing notes saying nonsense like, "I like you, do you like me back? y/n." We're adults, we can use our big words now."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> had a burnout i was churnin pages out too hard. this is a long one tho. I had alotta fun writing it too, there's uhhh gonna b more :} doesn't end here dw.

Late night thoughts flood Squidwards head, he can’t stop thinking about Spongbob. There’s so much he regrets. Every time he’s been mean to him, every insult, every grimace, he wishes he could take it all back. Squidward stares into his ceiling, before drifting off to sleep.

“GOOOOD MOOORNING, SPONGEBOB!!!” Patrick bellows into the rising sky, waving his jellyfishing net hello.

“GOOD MORNING, PATRICK!” Spongebob shouts back, “Ready for a bea~utiful day of jellyfishing?”

“YEAH! Then we’ll go back to my place and read some Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy, I got the new issue!” Patrick dances with excitement, today’s going to be a good day, but any day with Spongebob is a good day!

After a few hours of jellyfishing they decided it’s time to head back to Patrick’s place for lunch! While eating, Spongebob shifted awkwardly in his seat, almost like he wanted to say something, but was holding back. He stops chewing for a moment and sighs, “Are you gonna finish your sandwich, Spongebob?” Patrick asks.

“Yeah, but you can have my fries!” Spongebob replies with a smile. He watches as Patrick downs most of his fries in seconds. “Hey, Patrick? Can I talk to you about something?”

“Sure thing buddy!” Patrick says between chews. “What’s up?” 

“Well…” Spongebob thinks about what he’ll say next, he’s not sure if Patrick will have anything to help him. Patrick’s his best friend, whatever problem Spongebob has he’s sure Patrick can help!

“Well…?” Patrick stares with wide eyes, eager to hear what Sponge’s got to say.

Spongebob takes a deep breath in. “ImighthaveacrushonSquidwardandIdon’tknowwhattodoIdon’tknowhowtotellhimwithoutfeelingscared!” Spongebob expelled, the faster it’s out the quicker he can get Patrick’s response.

“Hmmm, why didn’t you just say so! Let’s go tell him right now!” Patrick’s response twists his stomach into knots. He couldn’t tell Squidward that he liked him, he just found out himself!

“No!” Spongebob rejects, “I… I mean, not right now. I can’t…I can’t tell him  _ now _ .”

“Well why not?!” Patrick asks, banging his fist on the table.

“I DON’T KNOW!” Spongebob cries, hiding his face in his hands, “I’m scared he won’t like me back.” Tears sting his eyes shut, he fears rejection more than anything in the deep sea.

“Aw, don’t worry pal, we’ll get through this together!” Patrick puts an arm around Spongebob to comfort him. Sponge takes a deep breath and wipes his tears, he’s determined to man up and tell Squidward how he really feels.  _ Sigh,  _ this will take a while.

Squidward paces back and forth, he’s fully admitted to his feelings. After work, he’ll  _ try _ to confess his love to Spongebob. He can’t bear to think about it, about  _ him. _ Squid’s heart beats longingly, as if it wants to tear out of his chest and confess to Sponge itself. He doesn’t want to approach him, he  **can’t** approach him. 

“I know, I’ll just, umm, write him a letter!”. Squidward thinks quickly, no that’s stupid. That’s kid stuff, running around and passing notes saying nonsense like, "I like you, do you like me back? y/n." We're adults, we can use our big words now.

He’s quiet for a second… “Why didn’t I think of that sooner?! I’m an artist! Expressing my love for Spongebob through art is a true act of pure admiration.” He huffs proudly. Squidward rushes off to his desk, takes a deep breath, and starts to write his love poem.

The weekend drags on, both waiting with anticipation. Fear keeps them in bed for a minute. It’s the only thing holding them back, like chains.

Spongebob steps out of bed, a little groggy, he’s finally going to confess. He’s tired of side-stepping around each other, just barely touching, just barely making eye contact. 

After work, on their walk home. If the walk home gets awkward, then it’s ok. He can stand a quiet walk home. If this turns out great he’ll have the happiest walk up his driveway and into his house, where he’ll cry tears of pure joy and absolute relief. 

Clothes? On. Breakfast? Eaten. Gary? Fed. Mail? Still in the mailbox… “I’ll just quickly go get my mail and then walk right on to work!” Sponge decides happily. 

Bills, bills, more bills, a letter, bill- a letter? Spongebob stares in disbelief, but also with quiet confusion. Why did Squidward send this letter? It’s beautiful though. The handwriting, so eloquently written. He admires it, “Read after work. ~Squidward Tentacles.” Wow… What could it say? Spongebob quickly shakes his head and rushes inside to drop his mail off. Right on the kitchen table, where he’ll be sure to see it.

Their walk to work was quieter than usual, well, Spongebob was still spewing on about his weekend, and whatever else he’s got on his mind, but there were moments where it was quiet enough to hear the kelp swish in the wind. It was even quieter at work, it was deafening. No jokes, no quips, banter, nothing. Just quietly dancing around each other, barely touching, barely looking. Just barely. 

Sponge took his time cleaning up the kitchen, mind lost to what could be written in the letter. So lost that he didn’t realize that Squidward left already. He’s missed his chance, “Better luck tomorrow, Sponge. You’ve got this!” Spongebob thinks encouragingly, even though he doubts himself. 

The walk home was noisy, too many thoughts clouded his mind. Some were reassuring,but most of them worrisome. What if Squidward knew and didn’t want to associate with him anymore… What if he hated him? Spongebob let out a deep sigh as he unlocked his front door.

The letter!

Spongebob slams the door behind him and rushes to the kitchen, just barely missing the doorway. He swipes his hands hastily on the walls, desperately searching for the lightswitch, “Oh barnacles.” He gasps in frustration. The light finally flickers on and he legs it to the table, where he grabs the letter, ready to tear it open. Then he stops and fear hits him harder than Sandy during karate practice. Spongebob takes two deep breaths,”Read after work. ~Squidward Tentacles.” Slowly, he flips it over, looking at the gorgeous red wax seal with Squidward initials on it. No way is there anything bad written in here, right? Sponge peels back the seal and unfolds the letter, letting Squidward’s wonderful handwriting calm him down immensely. 

“Love is a fickle thing, it’s hard to let your heart love, and it’s even harder to let it heal. Running around in circles, trying to find the one before we’re too old, before it’s too late. It’s restless, tiring. 

We’re allowed to rest, right? I’d love to relax, with my lover in my arms. Fantastic thought, the only one that I adore. The thought of it that really makes me love living. Wouldn’t you think the same? Just the two of us, finally catching a break. I don’t understand love, really. One day I’ll find the one, one day I’ll fully understand. You’ve helped me understand what love truly is, Spongebob. 

I love you, from the deepest parts of the ocean, to the skies we can’t reach.   
~Squidward.”


	4. Quietly, Lovingly.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "And they hold each other in the loudest silence, one that’s heard across the entire ocean."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beautiful finale, thanks for reading! i'm happy to be done <3.

Squidward paces back and forth in his dim and quiet bedroom, “That was so reckless, Squiddy! Now, what will you do if he rejects you? Go to work tomorrow!?” 

“I know, I’ll just write! Art calms the nerves of the artist. Instead of expressing these feelings myself, I let my art do the work.” Squidward says confidently, as he walks himself to his workspace.

As Squidward tidied his poetry, he hears a faint knock at his front door. It’s almost 10pm, who needs something this late? Squid’s a little apprehensive at first, maybe it’s spongebob coming to yell in his face, to reject him. “Deep breath in Squiddy, you got this.” he whispers while unlocking the door.

There stands Spongebob, tears streaming, letter squeezed into his hands. “Squidward...” he squeaks. He can barely get a word out before sobbing loudly, Squidwards takes him inside.

There on Squidward‘s couch, Sponge cries his eyes out. Squid walks out from his kitchen with a cup of water, it’s hard to see him this way, he hands him the cup. Spongebob takes it, sniffling. 

“Th- Thanks.” he says, quivering, he takes one long sip then sets it down on the table, by the letter. 

“I… I wanted to talk to you about the letter”. Spongebob looks at Squidward all puffy-eyed. Squidward already knows, though he still braces.

“Squid...” sigh. Spongebob wants to make sure that Squidward knows what he means, it’s all set in stone after this, right? “Squidward I, um…”, why does he hesitate? He feels his body burn up, the words are there and yet?

Squidward pulls him into a tight hug, “I know Sponge, I love you too.” Spongebob squeezes back.

And they hold each other in the loudest silence, one that’s heard across the entire ocean.

No more side-stepping around each other, as it’s now a quiet dance. 

Barely touching, always looking, hearts leaping in loves perfect waltz.


End file.
